In The Beginning
Don’t worry…It’s just a feeling!
22 October 2009 — I paid my $152.00 (plus postage & money order, because it can’t be done online in 2009), to register my business name in NSW. It’s ridiculous enough that I have to register my business name in 2 States, when one of those States (The ACT), covers a grand 2432 km^2 (0.032% of Australia’s Total Area); but your gunna love this…
03 November 2009 — The letter I received today from the NSW Office of Fair Trading, informed me that my NSW Business Name Registration was declined because the name — “NOSH-IT WOOD-FIRED PIZZA”, “is considered offensive to some members of the community”.
The Offense
My business name and the heinous act of trying to register it in the sensitive new age State of NSW.
Clearly I only represent a minority compared to the overwhelming majority of ‘community members’ that find my business name offensive.
So one can only assume that the overwhelming majority of ‘community members’ that are offended by my business name, are clearly not offended at baring the cost of protecting them from being so offended.
Their Evidence
None!
Exhaustive Research NOT DONE Prior to Their Decision
Not checking the Australian Securities & Investment Commission’s National Business Name Registry Database, where they would have found this — PDF of Registration Search Results — and had they actually read these FREE ONLINE SEARCH RESULTS, they may have noticed this:
- That there are already 7 businesses registered in Australia that use a variation of the name ‘nosh it’;
- That 4 of those 7 registered business names are already in NSW;
- That 3 of the 4 business names already registered in NSW use the name “NO SHIT”; and
- That 1 of the remaining 3 business names registered in Australia is “NOSH — IT WOOD — FIRED PIZZA”? It’s registered in the Australian Capital Territory (ACT), AND IT’S REGISTERED TO ME!!!
The NSW Office of Fair Trading also exhaustively didn’t:
- Check to find out that my current ACT Registered Business is also a Registered Food Business in the ACT;
- Check to find out that I have a Temporary Trading Permit issued by the National Capital Authority;
- Check to find out that I already have a NSW Food Business Notification Certificate; and
- CHECK THE FRIGGIN’ DICTIONARY to find out what ‘NOSH’ actually means!!!
Compensation
Don’t worry…this is all perfectly normal and reasonable and I’m ok with it..Really!.
They kindly offered to refund my $152.00, less $26 processing fee, which will slightly offset the $300.00 + $xx,000.00 in potential revenue that it’s cost me to submit the “Internal Review” documentation and wait for them to review this wise decision for the protection of the community.
In The Middle
Seriously, any more said by me at this point, is going to amount to nothing more than further spleen venting. I reckon you get the picture and can at least begin to extrapolate and comprehend the ‘good’ this is doing for our country?
Well, now that my business has, despite my best efforts, been ‘small business supported’ into oblivion, I’ve got nothing left to lose!
So! Chocks-out, Flaps-up, Hats-off, Stand-back, Smoke ‘em if ya got ‘em! I’ve had ENOUGH! And no, I don’t mean I’m giving up…not by a long shot! 
I’ll keep you posted…
Cheers
Stephen G
13 Comments
That is one seriously flawed process which needs to be fixed — I mean they can’t be serious
Remember to have coffee with me 
Hi Rae
So good to have you visit
And of course, it’s always nice to have someone agree with what one is saying
Unfortunately, not only are they serious, the worst part is that they will likely be overly serious because it’s funnier for them to watch me squirm. I used to be in the Public Service…and contrary to popular belief it is not at all void of ‘human nature’…some of the good bits, some of the bad bits…it’s just that the bad bits cost so much.
Anyway, I haven’t forgotten the cuppa…will let you know when I’m next heading into the big smoke
Thanks for calling in Rae…
Cheers
Stephen G
ahhh.. yes… I had to pay to get a transcript of a trial in which I was the Crown Witness… that seriuosly sucks… so many things need changing. We’ll get there.. I’ll be at Chocolate Olive in Phillip again tomorrow, coffee is on me.
R
Bless ya heart Rae. Thanks :- )
Cheers
Stephen G
No worries, happy to try and help you fix that if need be, I seem to be good at fixing broken processes
Dear Stephen, I hadn’t heard from you for a while so checked out your site. What a shock to see the suspended trading notice!
This phrase is about the saddest thing I’ve read online: ‘…now that my business has, despite my best efforts, been ‘small business supported’ into oblivion…’
I feel like there’s bugger all I can do except think of you. At least I’m doing that rather often. Best regards, P.
Mate,
Once again, a few words from you and I have to spend a day thinking about it
Your kind words and thoughts are more than enough ol’ Bean
.
Rather than pizzas cooking at the moment, it would be fair to say that I am the one that is now ‘cooking’…
Suffice it to say that the story hardly ends here…but what the next chapter will look like I cannot say just yet…stay tuned
Cheers and thanks
Stephen G
this just sucks — am so sorry about your troubles. If you were a US multi national wanting to lower our living wages for your Aussie staff, they’d all be paying you to open shops in their cities.
Hi Sheila,
Yeh! It sure does that!
I must admit that I’m becoming rather concerned…it’s kinda hard to walk the line between saying it how it is (from my perspective), and NOT coming across as some kind of bleeding-heart whinger.
I certainly don’t want to be tagged a whinger.
And I strongly agree with you about the ‘big company’ scenario. In fact in my earlier post ‘You can Bank on it…” I made a very similar observation.
The amount I need to continue the business (which is what I asked the Banks for), is less than 12% of what has already been invested in the business by myself and the community (i.e. taxpayers).
Again, I don’t want to sound like ‘Oooh! Poor Me, Poor Me!’ What I want to sound like is:
Is this what passes for our highest level of ‘Business Acumen’ in 2009?
How many other businesses have suffered at the hands of such decisions and ‘acumen’?
How much is it REALLY COSTING our country when such ‘acumen’ is tolerated, practiced, perpetuated & even defended?
Stuff like that…
Thanks again for stopping by Sheila, I really appreciate your fine ‘sting’
Cheers
Stephen G
Hi Folks,
An update:
If I’m gunna jump up and down about what I consider to be unfair, then I reckon it’s only fair that I act fairly…as I understand it.
A strange thing happened just before Christmas. I got a phone call. From whom? Guess
What did they want?
The Office of until recently ‘Fairly Stupid Trading’ have had a surprising reconsideration of their previous decision to decline my business name registration. I was informed that my business name ‘nosh-it Wood-Fired Pizza’ has been registered.
I can only wonder why they changed their minds. Was it my letters to the Ministers? Perhaps, but I don’t know for sure.
Though my application was submitted in October and my business has since stopped trading and the momentum built for trading (retail and wholesale), in NSW lost, I’m hardly ungrateful.
So thanks to the NSW Office of Fair Trading for at least reconsidering and being big enough to correct a mistake.
Where does this leave me? With a business name registered in NSW, no business and no money. But as always, I’m not about to give up. I have an idea which I am about to set in motion. The fact that my business name is still alive, at least in NSW, provides one vestigial foot-hold. It at least offers the possibility that I will not have to completely reinvent the business, branding, marketing, websites etc.
Oh, I didn’t tell you did I? Back in early November, just after I was informed that NSW had declined my registration, I got a letter from the ACT Office of Regulatory Services informing me that they had “inadvertently” registered my business name 14 months earlier. Hmmm! Anyway, I’m in the process of using my now Zero resources to appeal that decision too.
I can only hope in light of the NSW Office correcting their mistake, that the ACT Office may find a similar dignity.
Cheers
Stephen G
Thanks for your update, Stephen. Great to hear from you again. Truth sure can be stranger than fiction. I’ve stopped watching The Bold and The Beautiful and I’m sitting with my lime cordial and cheese supreme Doritos waiting for your next grip℗ing episode!
gawd.… well, i suppose that’s good news. At the very least, you’re going to be able to write a book on “Starting Your Own Business”
You certainly have experienced a lot of the things that can go wrong. Let’s hope 2010 is The Year of Things Going Right.
Hi Guys
So good to see you and thanks heaps for your comments…a heartening start to the year
Paul — might wanna pop some Vodka in that Lime Cordial mate…it could be a while. I’m about to face the ‘we want our money that you can’t pay’ battalion…
Hi Sheila
Yep! There’s no avoiding one’s self. Here I was, thinking that after years of ‘System Changing’, that I would just do a nice simple little small business…and what happens? I’m up to my armpits in the high-end of the ‘small business’ & finance sectors at the ‘system changing’ end.
Fortunately, though I am one for preferring that things ‘go right’ (meaning — getting my way ;-P), I’m old enough and ugly enough to have had this lethal expectation softened somewhat by sheer experience. This experience can be well summarised by the following adage — ‘whenever one argues with reality, reality wins’
.
Perhaps the book could be called “Starting Someone Else’s Small Business That I Thought Was Mine…Not and/or Almost!”? :- )…or ‘Work Your Way Toward Unemployment in 376 Easy Steps’?
We’ll see what this year brings and thanks again for bringing a couple of welcome buckets of hope
Cheers
Stephen G